Eating Out With Little Ones: Tips For Making Dinner Delightful Instead of Disastrous

I take the parenting stance that it's important to introduce our children to all kinds of experiences and situations at a very young age. We take our children virtually everywhere we go; to restaurants, the grocery store, the library, etc. It gives them a chance to learn how to act in different places, and they gain valuable life skills that will carry on throughout their childhood. However, having said that, I definitely feel that there is a right way and a wrong way to handle outings with children. The other night, my family had the opportunity to eat out at a local restaurant that isn't what I would call upscale, but is casual dining with mostly adults. The atmosphere is fairly quiet and subdued, but their was a child there, thankfully not mine, who was not behaving very well at all. It got me thinking about how I feel about children in a restaurant setting, and I realized that I have a few solid guidelines that I follow when we're out somewhere.

First, be flexible. Know your child, and go out at a time that is most likely to yield good results. This would exclude things like the middle of nap time, fussy time, etc. If that means pushing dinner back an hour, then it might just be worth it. The main goal is to help our children be successful in whatever situation they're in, and that means not setting them up for failure from the beginning. This also means being flexible about the place you choose. A crowded restaurant where you're going to have to wait to be seated may not be the best choice if there is some place else available.

Next, be prepared. I know that sounds like common sense, but it's amazing how many things we forget when we're rushing out the door. Active, little hands can mean big, messy problems at a crowded table. There are a few essentials I always try to have on hand when we're going out. 1. finger food: Just in case the restaurant doesn't have anything available, I always carry finger food in the diaper bag. I usually have a small container of cereal or baby yogurt bites, but we recently had dinner with a mom who had a container with several compartments that she'd filled with a variety of foods. I thought it was a very smart plan. These are also perfect for times when your child is really hungry and can't wait for the main meal to arrive. 2. Toys: I always try to have something to keep the little ones occupied. As they get older, many restaurants provide crayons and a place mat to color, but sometimes it's good to have an alternative. For infants, I recommend a soft toy such as a stuffed animal or soft book. One thing that really irritates me is when a baby has a toy he's pounding on the table. Gator is notorious for this, and trust me, the soft toys make a lot less noise. When Boo was a toddler, we kept an activity bag in the car filled with quiet things to occupy her. Recently, though, I've discovered the idea of busy bags. These are simple, quiet, mess-free activities that can fit into a zipper bag and be pulled out whenever needed. Lots of creative moms have shared ideas on what to put in these, and you can find a great list to get you started over at Still:Living. I'd like to make a few of these for Gator as he gets older.

Finally, be respectful. Sometimes all the flexibility and all the preparation in the world aren't enough to soothe an upset child or prevent a temper tantrum. It's important to be courteous of other diners and know when it's time to leave. Restaurant staff are great about packing to-go boxes quickly for a family with a crying child. And, yes, I might just be speaking from experience. Once, when Boo was a baby, we were eating at Fazoli's, and she started crying for no reason I could discern at the time. Dad told me to go ahead and eat, and he took her out to the car to try to calm her down and figure out what was wrong. Twenty minutes later, as I was finishing my meal, he came back in with her still crying. We switched spots, and I waited in the car with her while he got a box for his lunch. She calmed eventually, and Dad had pasta warmed up in the microwave. It wasn't a fun experience, but we were the only ones who knew it. If we hadn't taken steps to remove her from the situation, the whole restaurant would have had a bad time, and that wouldn't have been at all fair. Also, we need to be mindful of the waiters and waitresses. Their job is to take care of our food needs throughout the meal. Their job is not to entertain or clean up after our children. If, for example, Gator spills his Cheerios all over the floor, we pick them up. Again, I might be the voice of experience here.

If we follow these three main rules, we give ourselves and our children the best opportunity to learn and grow and to make some great family memories in the process. Not to mention, we all get to eat some great food that we didn't have to cook, and, best of all, nobody gets stuck doing the dishes.